Every day, I seem to have to turn the volume a little higher

The music just sounds better that way. I can hear the bass parts a little clearer – when you’re not working with obnoxious high-hats, it’s nice to hear the percussion.

I hope I’m not losing my hearing.

That would really be something, wouldn’t it? A music-listening enthusiast gradually losing his source of pleasure? It’s like masochism.

After you finish something really good, you have to stop and think back to yourself about what you’ve just experienced. When you read a piece of work by somebody else, you can compare the differences between yourself and them. Not always out of a sense of superiority or inferiority (but we all know that you’re objectively inferior because you haven’t actually published anything yet), but rather a sense of difference in style.

The fun thing about art is that you can push yourself onto someone else non-consensually!

That’s a weird sentence. But it’s an interesting one. Which is why I chose to keep it.

That’s my art. My style. My “forcing-you-to-look.”

Here’s how I can express myself. Admire me, criticize me, ignore me – it’s all alright. It’s all going to fit into some narrative I’ll make up at night. I’ll go to bed easy, no matter what happens. No matter what anyone says, no matter what anyone does, I’ll still be alright. I’ll accept it. A struggling artist is that way because they see hope for themselves – they see enough inspiration to grind through the tough times.

If it’s beautiful enough to inspire you through poverty, it’s enough to share it with other people.

Gee, I’m really trying hard to make quoteable sentences, aren’t I?

That’s my art. That’s my –

I’m really unoriginal.

When I see –

You know what, I’ll cut to the point. I read manga. I watch anime. Sometimes, I see some good shit, and it makes me thing about stuff. It gives me a little boost to push on and create my own good shit.

I know that a lot of people try to do the same thing, but it doesn’t quite come out right. It’s just regular shit. Everyone’s seen their fair share of regular shit. You go out to the seaside, where all the planks of wood are – what’s it called – boardwalk? You see the regular shit all the time, with all the caricatures and whatnot. Like, 5 dollars a head or something. 10, more likely.

Anyways, so you see those guys, and they’re just making regular shit. They’re not Picasso. They’re not Mozart. They aren’t going to have their own entry on Wikipedia. They’re just another tourist picture at best, and a prop in the background at worst.

You don’t judge those guys. It’s all regular shit, but it’s good that they’re still trying. Shitting is good. Excreting is a normal part of human behaviour. If you don’t do it, you… your blood gets infected or something; food poisoning-ish, maybe.

But really, you should be judging them. You should be admiring them, because they’re brave enough to shit in public. Do you do that? If we’re talking probability, probably not. But if you’re reading this, then you’re probably going to be brave enough and curious enough to find your own piece of shit to make.


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